When life seems hard and scary, did you think to eat?

Yesterday was BANANAS! I literally could not have created (or imagined) a crazier scenario.

Tech issues, before/during/after class.

Anxious rambling from yours truly.

Literal fire alarm in the MIDDLE of a guided meditation.

Oh, and have I mentioned that we’ve been snowed in for a couple of days?

But guess what, that’s life. And we really don’t have as much control over it as we’d like to think…

That lack of control is SCARY, and those fears often show up in our food choices or eating habits. As ideal as it might be to be a mindful eater, it’s more important that you eat. Period.

Did you know that not eating is a form of emotional eating? In fact, I noticed myself ignoring my hunger cues today as I replayed what went down yesterday. I realized that I was numbing out by not only avoiding my responsibilities but also by avoiding food. Because sometimes it’s easier to not eat. It might even seem safer to eat less than more. This is exactly what we explored in our first class.

Not being able to know precisely how everything will play out, or having your plans completely thrown out the window, requires flexibility and some grace. I’ve found that most people who struggle with disordered eating also struggle with perfectionism, which is why I chose to guide a Kundalini Yoga class as an “intentional rebel” — I didn’t wear all white, I didn’t cover my head, I didn’t lead us through a typical kriya, or a 22 minute meditation. I also didn’t plan on tech issues, personal panic attacks, fire alarms, or snow days.

And as hard as it is to roll with the punches, giving myself permission to not be perfect has allowed me to nourish myself completely. I don’t have to eat like all the other yogis out there. I don’t have to label my food, or body, as good or bad. I don’t have to lose weight, or be healthy. I can meet myself where I’m at, both on the mat and at the table.