Body grief can bring body peace

The same God who made the world made you. Your body is a gift! When was the last time you saw yourself through Their eyes?

 

I’ve changed. A lot.

My body has gotten bigger, and softer. But so has my heart.

When I stopped worrying about my health, my health improved. After all those years chasing after chronic fatigue, turns out I just needed to eat. To some that might look like I eat more or “worse” than I used to. And I don’t care.

Because I trust my body. Sure, there are days where I don’t like that my clothes don’t fit. But I refuse to live a smaller life just so I can wear smaller pants. I do NOT want to go back to judging every.single.thing that I put in my mouth as healthy or junk.

My relationship with food hasn’t always been healthy, but it is now. And while my own food/body struggles didn’t necessarily stem from a fear of fat they did affect my weight. Not eating out of fear of eating something bad, wasn’t healthy. Worrying that eating a donut or a bag of chips would kill me, wasn’t healthy.

I know now that cutting out entire food groups isn’t healthy. I know now that when I limited what I ate I accidentally limited how much I ate. I know now that eating “good” food doesn’t make me a better person.

Listen, I know how to lose weight. I know how to maintain weight. I also know that those thoughts and strategies no longer serve me. I know they keep me small, in more ways than one.

I never really knew how hungry, or how unhealthy, I was. But now I know that my physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health are far more important than my size. So I‘ll keep eating.

So there.

 

Give yourself permission to grieve your younger/ideal body. And when you’re ready, start a body gratitude journal. Keep it simple, like “just for today, I’m grateful I have hands because I could wave to my neighbor” — focus on what your body can do more than how it looks.